Woman,mighty is thy name.....

Stroll through a posh locality in the evening, you’ll find yourself in an ambience of fragrance of scents. A half clad angelic form whisks by your side—ruddy cheeks, ruby lips, flamboyant attire, curly locks, poignant eyes and all curves exposed slyly. Her fantastic sight arouses the ogler in you. You have to glance at her, you may mean it stealthily. But it must register with her or else you’ve treaded on her corns. After all what for has she appraised herself before the mirror for an hour? Just to entice her Romeos…. Be courteous to her for she is ‘Eve’, the temptress of Adam.

The Adam in man is inherent. He has not turned his eyes from the temptress. In this machismo culture, women remains a commodity well adorned individually, well placed in the showcase of social showroom-a figure to be had- merely an thing to satisfy man’s passions. She is meant to be kept confined to heart and home. She is ordained to remain in his ambit. Her tragedy is that she has accepted her role nay she is coquettish about it. Cosmetics are her life buoys. Tempting and enticing man is her perpetual interest at the same time lambasting man for his masculine culture is her pet hobby-what a paradox.

There is a notion that the status of women has undergone an overhauling in the past few decades. Names of various eminent women are cited to justify this notion. But does this advocate the fact that women enjoy a respectable position in this machismo world? All this is a mere hoax. The words of William Shakespeare “Frailty thy name is women” have left a permanent etching on my thought process. Such contemptuous remarks were again echoed by Khushwant Singh who referred women as a ‘perpetual parasite’ on male from the cradle to the grave—on a father before tying a nuptial knot, on a husband as a better half and on son as the ‘evening’ of her life.

How can one doubt on the strength of a woman, knowing that, even as a neonate she did endure the shock given by her own ‘not- so happy’ parents at the time of her birth. During her teenage she valiantly confronted the persistent gazes of one and all. Then during the later half of her life, she simultaneously did justice to her triple faceted countenance that of a mother, a daughter and a better half to a novice in handling the relationships.

How can an individual who has such a multi faceted dimension to her life be possibly so worthless a creature??
I leave the answer to you readers to decide whether God’s most sublime creation, woman, is just meant to be despised at.
Has she just been created to be kept confined to heart and home………..

In Conversation With God-1;

"Man proposes God disposes." For a supreme soul like me dedicated solely to the uplift-ment of mankind, a few things don't come easy! I belong to the breed of engineers infesting this planet who consider few acts as a lethal sin. Today on this propitious day of Maha Shivratri, in front of Lord Shiva, I am going to make the confession of the sin I did today.

me: "O' mighty and the most puissant Lord Shiva. I come to thy gracious abode to seek forgiveness!"

god:"yes, my son first tell me who are you and what is your model number? then tell me what have you done?"

me:"O omniscient, I am Ajay Kumar, model number 8:05 am,26th january 1990, House number 420 Haryana, India."

god:"My register shows no registered Ajay Kumar in it. Were you illllllll???"

me;"no my lord. I am a perfectly legal born son .sorry it is 1989. the habit of bluffing people on this earth made me think i could even bluff you and postpone my death... "

god:"I am omnipresent, omnipotent and the maruti omni. Yes my register has the following entry---
name:ajay kumar
born:26 jan, 1989
time of birth:delivery order signed at 7:58am, earth timings may vary as per urgency
death:one year after he loses his virginity
unique qualities:flirty, falls in love with every second girl, proposes to every third girl, gets ditched by every girl(and a die hard fan of Jessica Alba) "

(suddenly God shouts in havoc reckoning voice,"Parvati don't come outside. We have a very bad human here.")

god:(husked voice)"how is Jessica these days? The connectivity of metacafe is weak here up in these Himalayas; these politicians need to be taken to task."

me: "lets discuss it some other day. when we have vodka and rum with us. girls sound bad unless you are drunk"

god:"true..true...come to your confession part, you are wasting my time. Katrina has some problems with Salman going on. I have been called in the form of Allah to help. Morever, i have to see the movie My name is Khan, hope Karan Johar doesnt teach us to flee with our moms in this movie! The cosmos was full of eloping gods after KANK."

me:"Today, I put a disgrace to engineering breed. I took bath twice a week.(both time alone)"

god:"YOU SCOUNDREL, A**E HOLE; I send you to this earth for upliftment of mankind. Save water and teach the world the importance of water, and what have you done today you took a bath. You scum bag, you don't deserve to be here. I am going to make sure you don't live another second. I am going to open my third eye now!!!"

me:"NO, my Lord. It is Shivratri today, so I took a bath."

god:"ohhhhh, then it is ok. Take bath on every Maha Shivratri."

happy shivratri:-

chronicwriter!

"Mr. Prason Christopher Robin" is one big time blogger, he is the official owner of "www.chronicwriter.com" and writes under the pen name of "chronicwriter" famous for his red undergarment. Incase, Mr. Thackrey is reading this,which I doubt he will, chronicwriter shall delete his facebook account and deny the links with the blog. One thing I curiously need to know, why do south Indians have names worth giving wrist aches, and in some cases even tongue aches for illustration try to speak "Pilavullakandi Thekkeparambil Usha"?

Chronicwriter’s last post "save the tigers in the woods", did put me in a funny state. I read his blogs fortnightly not on a daily basis. So yesterday while suggesting a few juniors of mine interested in reading blogs, I without hesitation referred them to the ingenious poster-"chronicwriter". A few of my suggestion takers were girls!

A few moments later when I for my own updating turned to chronicwriter's blog, I was surprised to see his first adult post(it's not that I didn't enjoy it; he is too awesome not to make anyone laugh). So basically I made a "poo-poo" of myself.

On saturday I had a test in my CAT coaching test, and I am proud to inform everyone despite my best efforts( which include keeping the most beautiful girl's picture near me, copying from the nearby person, giving the test with katrina kaif's name) I topped. Please don't ask me from which side, but I topped!

We had a GD session after that which humorously turned into a fish market. A batch mate of mine, pronounced a beautiful sentence on marriage which ran thus-“marriage is not an institute where you experiment things”. Even in case it’s an institute I am eager to join it, please tell me the exam details. I will work doubly hard and make sure I top this exam, and this time from the front.

While typing this blog I received a chat message on gtalk from a CSE friend:

abhijeetranjan90: tomorrow is total mass bank for cse guys…

ajay: cool;

bt class also consists of girls…

abhijeetranjan90: dey can attnd

ps: 1)I would like to seek forgiveness from miss X for not including her in this post. I tried my level best but could not fit her in here somehow. I promise her a spot in the next one, and no charges.

2) My list for 14th February is up to date and complete, anyone interested can contact me at 14febonedaylover@gmail.com or st.valentinerocks@gmail.com

3) This is a free advertisement for chronicwriter, i wont regret the same from his side.

Uphill time going on, and harder times ahead!

It seems I have filled my plate with lots of trouble to last for my entire leftover engineering life of one and half years. The onus(es) I am trying to handle presently are the TPR post(Training and Placement representative) of my ECE batch, being the Executive Editor of SRIJAN the institute's annual magazine and not to forget my eight hours of CAT preparation classes on weekends. With only a month to go for the printing of magazine the whole SRIJAN team is haywire. To meet the deadline of 20th april release we have to start working nights, and today is the first night! Hell is in front of Saurav and Rajeev the team's two designers.
But no regrets, i am enjoying the pressure!

The side-effects of workload has started to show itself. I have started having nightmares. Last night Abhra, the magazines student editor, and Karan, the Managing editor, were running behind me with the previous year's magazine and dagger in their respective hands.

I had my birthday on 26th January. There were a few surprises waiting for me. One was, the X of my previous posts messaged me happy birthday and the second was, my blogs first post to whom I had dedicated called me. Unfortunately, i couldn't pick up the phone and had to settle by replying to her message. I recieved a deo from two of my classmates, most probably they pitied my irregularity at bathing and hoped it would help, however, as I am allergic to perfumes and deos had to tuck it in the suitcase. Thanks anyways yet I prefer friends who come empty handed.

Yesterday was my parents 23rd marriage anniversary and I turned out to be the last one to wish them. Thanks dad and mom for getting married and bringing me to this earth. Moving on to today; today was Ghandhi's assassination day. For the first time in my life I forgot to stand in silence at 11:30. Sorry Mr. Ghandhi! I was late by three minutes today. Hope you rest in peace.

Moving to lighter notes, we have Valentine's day coming. I am eagerly looking forward to it. I am hoping to propose a lot many this year. My fingers are crossed, and I seriously pray St. valentine gets a bit emotional and pities me...

A help from your side- make sure you send a pink boxer to Mr. Pramod Muthalik, a Ram Sene leader. He is greatly active in beating up couples visiting discos and seen roaming on 14th feb.
(google pink chaddi campaign for more details!)

Another 365 days of your life!

Look back at 2009 and you will surely find at least one moment that crystallizes out separately. Few of us lost someone whom we loved, some of us found someone who made 2009 remember-able, few of us tried a few new things out of which some failed and out of which some clicked. After all 365 days is not a small number! Lord Krishna’s words, “Good and bad, success and failure both make a life. Life without one of them is alike a world of sugar without salt.”

One such memory of 2009 is properly etched in the cerebrum portion of my approximately 500gm brain. I visited “Vaishnodevi” last march, and I saw something. The “something” was not something extraordinary; it was a pretty common scene to be seen in nearly every temple- a mother of a cute kid was asking her son to fold hands in front of the goddess. Nothing unusual! Nothing spectacular! My mother asked me to do the same thing when I was some five year old. However as far as I can recall she never gave me a reason that satisfied me on why I should fold my hands in front the idol.

Parents usually tell their children to do things and to abstain from rest. However, few are open up to discussions on the same. Marriage is one such thing. Love marriage in most parts of our country is still a taboo! Marriage decisions are made by our parents, amongst our parents for a life their children have to live. Haryana is a leader in murdering their children,who break these rules, in case the children fall in love with a person of the same village. “Khap Panchayats” are well known and well heard of taking decisions about life and death (as a matter of fact district and session courts even don’t have this right!). A few were killed and a few were banished the last year.

Similarly 2009 was memorable for mother India even. “Nations are born in the hearts of poets, they prosper and die in the hands of politicians”. Mr. Surendra Sharma, a comic hindi poet, well said once-“it was better when we were uneducated at least we voted for person like Sardar Vallabh bhai Patel and Lal Bahadur Shastri; and now when we claim we are educated we elect Lalu Prasad Yadav, Mulayam and Mayawati. ” Uttar Pradesh most probably added another tar to its already besmirched image. Mayawati squandered 2k crore rupees for propagation of her bloody party. Shibu Shoren is marching for power in Jharkhand. People of Jharkhand either go for cheap dirt like “kuda” who ate more money than his whole relations could digest and shit in the morning, or killer like Shoren!

Mr. Rathod is yet to be arrested. Hope so he gets arrested before he dies of old age!
May all of you have a memorable 2010!

Traveling Sick!

In case I sum up the total distance I traveled last week, the longest train route shall be runners up in comparison! I started from Himachal on 10th, spend more than three hours on the following three days in DTC buses, and on 14th started from Delhi for Orissa; covering a major section on the axis of the seventh largest nation on the planet Earth. The first thing I did as soon as I entered my home was to apply a pain relief ointment on my already heavily swollen butts. They seem to be at rest while I am writing this post. At least they are not stiff any more!

A reprieve from my not so entertaining journey (well 30 hours continuous journey every six months takes a traveler out of even Edmund Hillary; and I am not Edmund Hillary!) were two beauties sitting 16 seats away and all I got as my neighbors were four military men who every five minutes had the habit of sparking an abuse from their mouth. My best moment was when one of the beauties came up to me and said, "excuse me".

Basically I was standing on the way to wash basin so she wanted me to give way.
I smiled and enthusiastically replied with a big smile on my face-“sure!”
Can you sit down with me and have a talk; and did some one ever tell you your nose is indeed very beautiful!

I wanted to stand and stare at her but thought of the scenario and the trouble I might end up in. Minutes later I saw her walking with a hefty body builder who would have rolled the lover/flirter out of me in a single smack! I took the clue and settled upon looking at person who was not injurious to my health. The four military men were at least not injurious till the night came in. They were drunk after that!

Thanks to chronicwriter I became a bathroom writer today(refer to his section on how to deal with competitons in love on post no 366). I wrote two phone numbers on the already wonderful beautiful walls of the Indian Railway bathrooms and added the name of X from my previous post in front of it. I seriously hope those two who at some stage gave me competition are enjoying attending calls from “avid readers”!

I reached home safe and sound. A special thanks to all the naxalites, terrorists, brothers and sisters of Headley, Kasab and alike for not knowing my train number.

First sign of maddness!

I had my final practical last week, and I was forced to believe Chetan Bhagat and Durjoy Datta had a tint of truth when they wrote their novels.

One of my practical final was of Microprocessor. We were group of four who were simultaneously called for viva-voce. I was sitting beside a 9.7 pointer who intermittently went into hysteria of definitions and explanations before the sitting. I was asked the first question,”what is microprocessor?” the question in itself was not difficult but I was expecting something better. I replied,’ err…microprocessor…is a processing unit which accepts input and gives us output. It can perform various logical and mathematical operations like addition, subtraction, multiplication etc…”

The invigilator asked X, the 9.7 pointer, “Would you like to add something?”

“Sure, sir” She took a long breath and fired away an answer similar to a volcano emanating from the mouth of Hungarian Horntail in Harry Potter. She fired in a single breath, “A microprocessor is a multipurpose, programmable, clock driven, register based electronic device that reads binary instructions from a storage device called memory accepts binary data as input and processes data according to those instructions and provides result as output.”

I was just on the verge of taking out my cell and calling the ambulance fearing she was going to have an attack of hypoxia.

My practical are finally over and I have my semesters coming from 2nd December, and I am planning to start the herculean task of studying as soon as I complete this blog. However, believe me it is pretty difficult to study especially when 1)you are surrounded by snow clad mountains who shriek whenever you pick up a course book-“dumb ass it is a crime not to sleep in this weather!”, and 2)when you are in love.

Unfortunately I have both these conditions applicable to me and my latest love is legendary. “Legendary” at its height! [Even Barny Stenson would have gasped after hearing it!] For one her name is Ananya Swaminathan (though I still have problems pronouncing her name properly. I am looking forward to Tamil classes these holidays) and two she is an imaginary girl who surfaced in the fourth book of Chetan Bhagat “two states”.

P.S. 1:-- I don’t need a psychologist or a psychiatrist; and ha in case you know the real person on whom Ananya is based please let me know! At least I can do something about my love problem!(I still have my fingers crossed for my papers and am open for help from the fellows going to sit around me in the semester papers.)

P.S. 2:-X is a real person of my class. I had kept in lieu of X her real name for a few hours, however tending to her objections i had to change it to X.[if you can read between the lines, i am afraid of litigation she might file against me. so better keep bay!]